The Big Night!

It's finally here. After almost 48 years without ever being married (or engaged for that matter) tonight I am proposing to my lovely girlfriend Angelina. I NEVER thought I'd be doing this -- I mean, after I turned 45 I figured marriage was a mine field that I had carefully and expertly navigated through without being blown to pieces. Many if not most of my friends have been married two, three even -- that's right -- four times, and for many years I feared that I too would suffer the same results if I were to get married. But, I have met the perfect girl and she's the best thing by far that has ever happened to me, so I'm thumbing my nose to all the naysayers and I'm taking the big leap -- that is, if she says "yes". We haven't discussed it that much, and she's not one of those women who is always pushing to get married -- so I really am hopeful she'll go with the program. If not, I just spent a s---load of money on a fancy piece of glass that I don't imagine they'll take back. So, we'll see. I know she won't read this before I pop the question, because she's scared to see what I'm writing on my blog and has stayed away from it altogether. One problem is that long ago I told many of my male friends that if I ever started talking marriage that they were to hit me in the face as hard as they could -- to really lay me out, to just cold-cock me. I hope they've all forgotten their promises, because otherwise I'm going to be walking around wearing a catcher's mask for the next couple of weeks to avoid getting my ass kicked. I'm taking Angelina to an Italian restaurant, the same place where we had our first date 2.5 years ago. I'm thinking of hiding the ring in our antipasti. If it all goes as planned, it will be THE greatest night of my life. If not, I may jump off the Bay Bridge. Speaking of the Bay Bridge -- to see how it will look after the construction is completed (20 years from now?) take a peek at: www.sfgate.com\baybridge.

Mickey Joseph is a Talent!

I have a good friend who is a consummate performer and entertainer and his name is Mickey Joseph. He currently resides in San Carlos and is raising two wild teenagers, so he has his hands full, to say the least. I first met Mickey in 1987 at a comedy open mic in Palo Alto at a place called Emerson's Bar & Grill. It was a hellhole for young upcoming comics back then, because people would go there just to heckle and hassle the comedians on stage. One night when I was emceeing the show, a young balding guy walked up to me and asked if I would take a minute to listen to some of his act. We went out on the back patio at Emerson's and he did his act for me in the dark. I was amazed. It was incredible. He did impressions, his physcial stuff was outstanding, his timing was on the money -- I was very impressed to say the least. So, I wasn't real surpirsed when I heard shortly thereafter that the guy was headlining all over the country. Mickey is an "old school" comedian, a throwback from the days of borscht belt comics and vaudeville performers. His imitation of Sergeant Bilko is so right on it's eerie! He's also a great person when it comes to supporting other young comedians on their way up. I began writing jokes for Mickey, and soon we became really good friends. He's helped me with my act and 2.5 years ago he introduced me to my lovely girlfriend (who will hopefully be my fiancee before this day is over.) Mickey currently stars in the incredible tribute to Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Junior and Joey Bishop that is playing to rave reviews all over the country. It was here in SF for quite a while at the Post Street Theater and should be coming back. Mick plays Joey Bishop and he does a really impressive job. He plays Joey his way and it works. In the business they'd say he has made the part his own. (By the way, Jeff Applebaum, another really funny comic and a friend of mine plays Joey Bishop in the show too -- he and Mickey cover for each other and do it in different cities). Mickey and I have also co-produced a series of shows at the Lil Fox Theater in Redwood City. "The Mickey Joseph Show" is a variety show with comics, music, magic and more. I also helped edit Mickey's autobiography, "What Would Do Corleone Do?", which is a really fun read and offers a glimpse into the man's hilarious boyhood and his ascent to success in comedy, music, writing and acting. For more on Mickey Joseph, check out his web site at: www.mickeyjoseph.com.
He's a great talent and you'll see him on TV one day, there's no doubt.

Where can you get good help these days?

I had planned to do some more blogging today, but my assistant, Ratdog, just called in sick. Can you believe it? My take on what happened is that he partied a little too hard last night, and now he has decided he wants a three-day weekend. I just know he's faking it. His timing couldn't be worse -- I have a VERY important day today and I need his help, but he's going to leave me in the lurch, the little runt! He said he thinks he has the bird flu. Hah! More like the bull---t flu, if you ask me. He's kicking back in his crate with his doggy toys right now and laughing at me. Let's see how much he's laughing when I get a cat to replace him!
For more information on how to deal with manipulative dogs, visit www.animal.discovery.com.