Saturday, June 06, 2009

If Fatty Had Only Lived Now..

Poor Fatty Arbuckle really had a tough life. If you don't know who he was, well--I don't have the time to take you through it right now. Google him. Anyway, the man was wrongly accused of a crime he didn't commit, in my opinion, which essentially ruined his career. In many ways, his life parallels a lot of other overweight comic actors, like Jackie Gleason, John Belushi, John Candy and Chris Farley. Fatty fought his demons, and one of the biggest of them was overeating. Let's put it this way--Fatty's eating habits made Babe Ruth look finicky. Maybe if he had lived now, when we have excellent diets and diet pills that work, he might have been able to lose that weight and get out of being typecast the rest of his life in funny guy fat boy roles.

Barack Has Had His Bombers

President Barack Obama will tell you that he hasn't had the best luck with cars in the past. In fact, he claims, he’s had some real clunkers along the way to the White House.
"The car I learned to drive on was my grandfather's Ford Granada," the president told an Indianapolis radio station during the campaign. "It may be the worst car that Detroit ever built. ... This thing was a tin can. They wanted to keep the cars big, so they made them out of tin foil. ... You basically couldn't go over 80 (miles per hour) without the thing getting out of control."
Now, we find out, courtesy of Bloomberg News that Obama drove a Fiat during college. During a meeting on Chrysler's planned tie-up with Fiat SpA, the president "recalled the mechanical problems that plagued his old car."
Better luck may await the President, however. Obama bought a Ford Escape hybrid during the campaign and regularly touts the vehicle including most recently at a White House event where he was surrounded by other auto CEOs and Ford Motor Co. CEO Alan Mulally.

Is Jacko Taking Care of Business?

Believe it or not, Michael Jackson and are are almost exactly the same age. He was born one day before me, so we're both 50. The other day when I found out that I have to do a colon cleansing, for some strange reason, I flashed on Michael. As well all know, the poor guy has had his share of problems (why didn't at least just one of his advisors tell him NO! when it came time for his first plastic surgery many years ago?). But, I thought to myself--how is his colon? No, seriously--do you think Michael has taken the proper precautions to make sure his colon is clean? If I could get to him, I'd tell him to do it. Get it done because you have to get it done, Mike!