Wednesday, April 09, 2008

My First Stalker!

(FYI: Broowaha is a citizen writers network that I write for in conjunction with this blog.)
BrooWaha and my blogging experience have brought me joy, fame and an outlet for my writing. And now -- my very first stalker!
A buddy of mine called me last week and said, “Hey dood, have you Googled your name lately?” Unlike John Mayer, I don’t Google myself every day.
“You have a stalker, man,” he informed me. “What the heck,” I replied. “I thought stalkers were for celebrities, not bloggers.”
I guess I was wrong. I Googled my name and lo and behold, I found my first hater. I’m not going to tell you the name of his blog, because he (or she) doesn’t deserve the publicity. But, here is what they wrote:
“I know a lot of you are wondering “what’s up with f-----g Broowaha lately”? Well I’ll tell you, Ed Attanasio just can’t stop writing about everything from the San Jose Sharks to what’s the best hot dog in San Francisco. He’s like a serial killer with a sharpened wit and nothing to do but blog.
Our sources have discovered that Ed’s bloggfrenzy could be a due to the fact that he’s in an insane asylum and has access to a computer. One of our sources at a MAJOR MENTAL INSTITUTE has seen Ed A. (patient 09879-41) scribbling ideas on anything he can get his hands on. From toilet paper to game boards. Here’s just a brief shining example of his latest literary contribution.
“…when the women I kill scream, they almost sound operatic. That’s why I like to keep them alive for as long as I can before strangling them.”
This is the first in a 10-part series profiling the life and times of San Francisco’s busiest blogger, Ed Attanasio.
We’ll bring you more each day as this tale of “blogging gone wrong” unfolds.”
The person who wrote this also went to a lot of trouble to put 5 photos of me on their blog, pictures that have been placed on blogs and web sites I write for. That must have taken a lot of time and trouble to do something like that. It means that they had to go through all the sites I’ve ever written for and cut and paste the photos from each. Wow. Stalking can be a lot of work, it seems.
Another troubling thing is that he/she has me listed on his/her blog as “Dead Attanasio.” Nice, huh?
This whole thing represents an “I told you so” moment for my fiancĂ©e. When I first started blogging in July of 2006, she told me that I could not put her real name or her photo on my blog. (That’s why I always refer to her as “Angelina”) She also warned me against putting photos of myself or my real name on my blog. “They’re a lot of haters out there,” she warned me. I scoffed. Well, I’m not scoffing now.
When I first started writing for BrooWaha, somebody sent me a message on my blog that said, “You’re writing too much on Broo. You’re hogging the venue and should back off.” Wow, I thought at the time. That’s a pretty snarky thing to say.
But, I like to write. About the Sharks and hot dogs and stuff like that. So sue me. And stalk me, if it gets you off. One thing is certain -- this idiot won’t slow me down. He or she (a disgruntled former Broo-ster, perhaps?) has only given me a new zeal for writing….and blogging.

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